Hello dear reader.

I need to correct a mistake I made in my last post, Memorial in Washington.

I incorrectly started that the article I quoted had come from That was wrong. The article came from

I apologise for any confusion this may have caused.

Until next time…

Memorial in Washington

This whole situation makes me angry because people like me, and many of you I’m certain, are being treated like we’re doing something horrible by using pain meds for what they were intended to be used for.

Hello dear reader.

The purpose of this blog is to try to find ways to enjoy life as much as possible while dealing with chronic illness/pain. Recently, however, I’m fighting for any quality of life.

I’m talking about our government’s decision to end opioid use. I’ve written before about the difference between use and abuse.

I read an article on Medium about the “Prescribed to Death” memorial being put up in Washington. Here’s the link if you’re interested:

I have to say in all honesty, this article infuriated me. This was my response:
I am so sorry for people who have lost someone to a drug overdose. That being said, I think this “memorial” is one of the worst ideas I’ve heard.
I live with chronic, debilitating pain constantly. Without the opiods I’m prescribed I would be dead. Period. I take the minimum amount of medication I can and still function. I don’t abuse my medication.
I went so far as to have electrodes implanted in my head (TENS unit). I’ve had my nerves burned. The list goes on and on. Nothing has worked. So I rely on pain meds to get out of bed in the morning, be as functional as possible throughout the day, and be able to sleep at night. I’m one of the majority of people who take opiods. The ones who don’t have a choice, who are responsible and careful with them, the ones who are being threatened with a death sentence by the government.
So put up your memorial if it makes you feel better. And start digging graves for the people like me.

Here’s an example of how insane this situation is becoming…I’m always very careful to read the information sheets when I start on a new medication. I want to be aware of potential side effects and interaction issues. I was put on a different pain medication last week. No matter how responsibly you take them, your body will build up a tolerance over time and they will no longer work. After spending 6 weeks in bed because I was in too much pain to move, my doctor and I decided I had reached that point. I was shocked when I read the information sheet on this new medication. There was nothing about side effects. There were no instructions about things like whether it needed to be taken with food. There were two pages of small print as usual, but the only information was about how addictive opiods can be, how dangerous they can be, how if you took them while pregnant 😯 the baby would be born addicted, and on and on. I had to look the medication up online to find out potential side effects and instructions. Does anyone realize how dangerous that is, to not know which side effects are normal and which are life threatening?

This whole situation makes me angry because people like me, and many of you I’m certain, are being treated like we’re doing something horrible by using pain meds for what they were intended to be used for. It terrifies me because I feel like my quality of life is being threatened… actually, my life itself. Nobody can be expected to live in constant agony, unable to function at all. Suicide rates are going to jump drastically if our government succeeds in making narcotics, opiods, opiates, etc. impossible to get.

Normally I would apologize for going on a rant, but not this time.

What do you think about this issue?
How do you feel about it?
I’d really like some feedback.

Until next time…

Prep day

Thanks for helping me keep it light today.

Hello dear reader.

Today is going to be lots of fun. It’s prep day! I’m having my colonoscopy tomorrow afternoon. I’ve had a few of them and I know they’re not so bad. The bad part is the day before. Even if you’ve never had a colonoscopy, I’m sure you can imagine. So last week I got an email from the doctor’s office saying I needed to send them $35 for a prep kit.

This kit contains enough powdered Gatorade to make a gallon, a jar of laxitive powder to mix into the Gatorade, laxitive pills (4), a box of jello mix, three packages of chicken bullion, and (my favorite part!) four individually wrapped tush wipes. I think I got my money’s worth, don’t you?

I also received 9 pages of paperwork to fill out, and an instruction packet. One page in that packet gives me very clear directions including what time I should do what.

As you can see, I need to mix up the Gatorade at 3:00, but not put the laxitive powder in it until 5:00. As I said, very clear. I don’t know if you can read it at the bottom of the page, but it even tells me to stay close to the bathroom.

So what on Earth would make me think that you want to know the details of prep day? Because I’m trying to put a positive spin on it by giving you something to laugh at. I mean, tush wipes? That alone was worth the $35!

Thanks for helping me keep it light today. It’s much easier when people are laughing with me, or at me. I’ll take laughing any way I can get it.

Until next time…

Pure at heart!

My next response was that I needed to share this with others.

Hello dear reader.

I read this post and it blew me away! This was my first response:
What a wonderful reminder! I have tried to live that way all my life and raised my children to be respectful, polite, and compassionate.
We can only see bits and pieces of people’s lives. We don’t know how much pain a smile is hiding. I believe we should look for opportunities to lift others up. This word or a simple act of kindness can make a bigger difference in someone’s life than you realize.
This post was wonderfully written and meaningful

My next response was that I needed to share this with others. So I asked the author at Godly Chick Diaries if I could repost it on my blog. She graciously gave me her permission. So here it is. I hope it speaks to you like it did to me.

Until next time…

The Opiod Battle

I know this can be a controversial subject, but I hope we can start a civil and compassionate conversation about it.

Hello dear reader.

The news lately has been full of (among other things) the “Opiod Epidemic” and how we need to stop it.

Before I go any farther with this I want to be very clear about something. Opiod abuse and opioid use are two very different things. I’m 100% on board that abuse needs to be stopped.

That said, opioid use is not in itself a bad thing. Without opiods I would be dead, plain and simple. I wouldn’t be able to do anything besides writhe in bed screaming in pain. I would have bailed years ago.

Here’s what my mornings are like… I hate, really hate waking up. Before my eyes open I’m being screamed at by no less than four different parts of my body. Opening my eyes usually adds more pain. The VERY first thing I do is take a pain pill (an Opiod). 15-20 minutes later I can usually move without it being complete torture, usually.

Now imagine that scenario without the pain meds. And that’s just the very beginning of the day. I’m pretty sure you can figure out the rest of the day on your own.

I’m very fortunate to have found a really good pain management doctor who works with me to try to take as little medication as possible and still be able to function. I take random UA’s and have to bring all of my meds with me to every appointment.

I’m on Medicare and Medicaid, so the government gets to decide what medications I can or can’t have. I’m afraid every time I go to the pharmacy that I’m going to be told they won’t cover this or that anymore. No, it’s not paranoia. It’s happened a few times.

The point to all of this is that people like me, and there are a lot of us, are paying the price for people who abuse drugs. It seems that opiod use is trying to be stopped, when the problem is abuse.

I’ve put a link on here to an article from The Mighty written by Mikki Ingram. It states the problem in a clear and concise way. I really hope you’ll read it. It’ll open your eyes.

This is another article well worth reading

I know this can be a controversial subject, but I hope we can start a civil and compassionate conversation about it.

Until next time…

New Things

I’m digging deep to find things to be positive about today. It’s been a week since I’ve been able to get out of bed.

Hello dear reader.

This is the last post for Chronic Living. I know you’ve all been holding your breath wondering what the new name of this blog will be. I really appreciate those of you who took the time to share your preference. The new name is… drum roll please… Finding Life Through Pain. It was a landslide. There was actually only one vote that wasn’t for that one.

Since we’re making changes, there’s one more I’m going to ask several of you to make. When you read this blog from a link on Facebook or Twitter, please put your likes or comments on the actual blog site. It’s difficult to keep up with when responses are coming from different places. It’s even more important now with so many people leaving Facebook. When you follow the link to the blog site, there’s a button you can use to follow the blog from there. You’ll get an email when a new post is up.

Okay, the business end is done. Now let’s talk about something positive (not that those were negative). I’m digging deep to find things to be positive about today. It’s been a week since I’ve been able to get out of bed. One good thing is that I’ve had lots of time to listen to my audiobooks. Did I tell you I’m addicted to them? I love to read, and since I plan to actually be published someday, reading is vital. I also love to do my craft stuff. When I discovered audiobooks I realized I could do both at the same time. I can “read” while I’m cleaning, cooking, driving, or almost anything. Also, when I’m in bed and can’t stand any light because of the headaches, I can even read then! There are a lot of places online where you can download audiobooks for free. Librivox has a lot of classics (I absolutely adore Dickens), YouTube has a good selection, just Google ‘Free Audiobooks’ and you’ll find tons. There is also Audible. It’s not free, but you can choose the option that’s not very expensive. My favorite thing about Audible is the Daily Deal. Every day there’s a different book at a reduced price (between $2 and $5). I’ve discovered some incredible authors like that, ones that I’d have never known to look at. Warning: I shared Audible with my daughter and now she’s as addicted as I am.

Another positive, and this one’s even bigger than audiobooks! I have the most wonderful husband any woman could ever imagine! That’s a positive I hang onto no matter how bad things get.

What are some of the positives you grab onto when everything seems horrible? What keeps you going?

I didn’t mean to turn this into a commercial for audiobooks. You know I tend to rant at times. And I found a positive to write about.

So on that note, I’ll say goodbye to Chronic Living and be back soon to say hello to Finding Life Through Pain

Until next time…